Progress Report 12-26-17

Self Love: What is something you love about your body? Your personality?

I love my eyes. I love my verbal skills and the way my brain processes puns

Be More Positive: Think about the best parts of your life when you're stopped at a stoplight
Know Yourself Better: What am I worried about?

I will burn out from all of the love and service I provide

Self Aware: How do you deal with challenges in your life?

I try to out maneuver them or use them to my advantage in some other aspect of my life.

Self Care: Eat Something Healthy

Know Thyself: How do I like to relax?

Music, reading, driving. Usually I'm alone, or with someone who makes me comfortable enough to act the way I would alone. 

Attitude Adjustment: No complaints
Happiness: Work up a sweat
Gratitude: Who is a leader of teacher you are grateful for?

 I am thankful for my eighth grade history teacher, Janet. She recognized my leadership and supported confidence early. She fostered a love of learning through oral history and started me in my radio internship when I was fourteen. She continued to encourage my growth in special ways, seeking advice and offering guidance wherever necessary. She loves all of her students and went out of her way to give us the best support and instruction. She invited us to her home and celebrated every accomplishment. I want to be a teacher just like her one day. I want to be a mom like her. I want to be a learner and a professional academic like her. Of course no one is perfect, but I look up to her so much.

Move Forward: Learn from mistakes

Something I learned about myself today is that even though I take pleasure in people, I am exhausted by them. I truly am an introvert because reflecting on today's challenges I realized, what I do to relax and what I do for fun are two different things and for me to feel happy I need a balance of both. When I relax I need to be alone. However, I am sad when I am alone. It is paradoxical but today it made sense. I had a very relaxing morning spending two hours in bed reading and reflecting. Then I spent six hours with two friends, Lucie and Natalie. I care about them very much and enjoyed every moment we spent together, however, as soon as Lucie left the house I went to my room and started playing a mindless game. I was so tired and needed to rejuvenate.  When I caught myself playing the game I deleted it from my phone. My goal is to be productive. If I want to space out I can do that without additional stimulus. I need to be present with myself. My friends and my games are distractions because I truly do not enjoy being alone, but being alone may be what I need to be healthier. Perhaps I don't need to work hard to make new friends next semester, perhaps I can learn to be okay with being alone. I will watch a lot more T.V., I will work out a lot more, I will probably sleep and read more too. I'm excited to experience what is next for me in life.

Today's chapter in the breakup guide is about values. It asked me what my ideal lover is like.
I answered: I want him to be kind. I want him to be fair. I want him to be a hard worker. I want him to be a critical thinker. I want him to be self-aware. I want him to be affectionate. I want him to be fun loving. I want him to value family. I want him to value time together. I want him to be interested in me and my profession and my interests. I want him to want to travel. I want him to be ambitious. I want him to have a clear idea about his goals and purpose. I want him to have passion. I want him to live, not merely exist. I want him to be intentional. I want him to be trustworthy. I want him to listen. I want him to be compassionate.  I want him to be honest with me. I want him to want me. More than anything I want him to try and make it work even when things get hard. I want him to value me and our love. These of course are characteristics anyone can posses in various quantities. I do not believe in one person, only a type of person. And, loving this type of person, will never be a bad thing. Love is never a bad thing.