Progress Report 12-19-17

Applebees is great. I cannot begin to explain the warmth I felt envelop me as I walked through the door. Even without the signature 80's pop-rock playing (it was switched to the seasonal holiday tunes) it felt like home. While driving around singing with Berit I got a text from some coworkers asking when I'd be returning to work over the holiday. Originally I considered trading my job at Applebees for some volunteer service at the church or in the community but I recognized that where God was pointing me right now, is right down the road. Every minute I worked at Applebees over the summer I was incredibly happy, but I noticed that when I wasn't working I was incredibly miserable. I will not allow myself to feel that way again. I will work so long as I am joyful. And I will work so long as I am helpful. I will work in the spirit of my self-improvement. For example, I'm going to learn how to be a server this break. I've never been more excited for a meaningless promotion. It's another acting exercise. Another opportunity to fake it until I make it.

I tagged along with my parents to a sleep number store at the mall North of town. I laid on a mattress and looked up at the ceiling and heard my mother laugh. My dad joked with the sales lady, Stacy, and my mother looked so comfortable and relaxed. "What a cute date" I thought. They held hands as Stacy adjusted the firmness and the support of their bodies. They were so completely happy and I felt warm. Prioritizing my family and this time together has already taught me how lucky I am. They were in love, and then life happened. Twenty years after their hard times began, they lay happily together in a bed. One day, not tomorrow or a year from tomorrow, or even five years and a day from tomorrow still I may not, but one day I will run through Ikea like Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Grodon-Levitt in 500 days of Summer and I will lay on a sleep number bed. I am patient. I am trusting. I will be loved. I am loved. I love family. I love myself.